Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Nit-Picking: Jurassic Park

*SPOILERS*
Jurassic Park is by far one of my favorite movies of all-time. When I saw this movie as a kid it blew me away, so much so that I wore out the VHS copy that I had of it. Yet, let’s all be honest with each other and point out that this movie does have it share of plot holes and moments where you’ll ask yourself “What?” and “Why?”. So, with that said let’s get right into it.
Let’s start with the actual cloning of the dinosaurs. In the movie it was made clear that there were gapes in the dinosaur genetic code that they took from the mosquitoes. This caused the scientist to go on and mutate the code and blend it with frog DNA.
Did you get all that?
Now, in the movie we also learn that all the dinosaurs in Jurassic Park were purposely made female. This was done so that there would be no unauthorized breeding in the park.
I can buy that.
Moving along, we have a scene late in the movie where Dr. Alan Grant, Lex, and Tim come across dinosaur eggs. Dr. Grant goes onto explain that “Some West African frogs have been known to spontaneously change sex from male to female in a single sex environment”.
Um, what?
So, you’re expecting me to believe that a group of very intelligent scientist, that want to control breeding, did not look into the habits of the frogs that they were splicing into the DNA of the dinosaurs? I mean this is a HUGE problem. Were they under the gun and just didn’t have the time to look into the frogs? Were some of their funds cut? This seems like a very important detail they should’ve known about.
Let’s keep going and talk about the whole T-Rex enclosure.
When we first see the T-Rex’s cage they try to coax out the giant dinosaur by offering her a goat to eat, which comes out of the ground. During this scene we can clearly see that the goat is on a ground leveled with the base of the enclosure.
Later on, during the scene where the T-Rex escapes; we can see that the dinosaur is walking on a ground leveled to the base of her enclosure. Now, once the T-Rex attacks the car with the kids in it and eventually pushes the car over the side, suddenly the ground that the goat and T-Rex were once on has disappeared and now in its place is a giant hole that goes straight down. What happened to the ground? Did it sink? Why is there a giant drop off all of the sudden? It makes no sense.
Let’s just say that giant drop off existed originally. There would be no way for the tourists to see the goat or the T-Rex. It would be a terrible design decision, almost as bad as a small thermal exhaust port, connected directly to the main reactor of a massive battle station (HA! Star Wars reference).
Focusing on just the T-Rex now, I want to talk about all the vibrations the dinosaur causes when it starts approaching.
Before the T-Rex escapes we see a cup of water vibrating in the car Lex and Tim are occupying. This gives them a heads up that the dinosaur is on its way.
Not to long after this scene there is another scene where Dr. Ian Malcolm is in the back of a Jeep Wrangler. He starts to hear the T-Rex approaching and sees a puddle of water on the ground is vibrating. Yet, at the end of the movie where our heroes are surrounded by Velociraptors, the T-Rex is able to sneak in and save them without anyone noticing he’s coming.
Now, maybe they were all too busy in trying to survive that they didn’t notice, but you’re telling me that the raptors didn’t sense a larger predator was coming and didn’t get the hell out of there?
Also, how did he get into the lobby? In the movie I did see plastic where he’s emerging from. Maybe there was an unfinished wall or something.
Staying at the end of the film; there is a scene where Lex is trying to get the park back online while Dr. Grant and Dr. Ellie Sattler are holding a door shut, keeping the raptors out. We see Dr. Sattler struggling to reach a gun with her foot, but she is having no luck. The other person in this scene is Tim, who is doing NOTHING to help. He’s just jumping up and down with his hands on his head as Dr. Grant and Dr. Sattler struggle to keep the raptors out and Lex tries to get the park’s network back up.
You would think that Tim would pick up the gun and give it to Dr. Sattler … nope he just watches as the raptors try forcing their way into the room. I mean he does eventually give Lex moral support but getting the gun would have been more helpful.
Lex does eventually get everything back online, which allows the locks to be used again, which brings me to my next point. Are all the locks in the visitor center electronic? Why aren’t there any backup locks that aren’t electronic? You know locks that would be useful if the power goes out and the dinosaurs escape their enclosures and try to eat you. I mean come on.
Then there are the locks or lack there of in the cars. Why is it so easy for tourist to jump out of a moving car and enter dinosaur habitats? Wouldn’t you think if they can move a car without a driver, dispense of a goat remotely, and create dinosaurs, that the cars would have locks controlled by the control room? I mean John Hammond says “We spared no expense”, but let’s be real. I think you sparred some expenses when it came to park security and research.
Do you know how many lawsuits they would have if regular tourists just jumped out of the cars? Honestly who in the hell built this park? It’s just one giant death trap.
Getting back to Lex, the “computer genius”; if this girl is so smart why in the hell did she shine a light on the T-Rex, attracting her to their car? She’s the reason the T-Rex attacked them and if her brother died it would’ve been all her fault. Maybe it was just her being scared and not thinking, but even if I was scared I wouldn’t be turning on a flashlight and attracting the giant, meat eating dinosaur. I’d probably be hiding under a seat or something.
I can continue and point out numerous mistakes the movie has but they aren’t necessarily that interesting. The points I brought up above are the ones I feel are the more interesting ones to read about.
Now, don’t let this nit-picking keep you from seeing Jurassic Park. Like I said at the start, Jurassic Park is a great movie and everyone should see it.

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